Demystifying the Process: How to End Counseling
Just like the intake session, the termination session is a bit different than other sessions you have had. Experiencing a healthy good-bye is a powerful thing so it’s important to have a termination session. We want to provide you with a little of what to expect from it.
Accepting That People Might Not Like You
This seems funny to talk about, but it’s actually a significant factor in lots of lives. Here's the long and short of it. You will interact with people who don’t like you. WILL. Not “maybe you can sway them,” but actually, “some people won’t like you.” Period. Sit with that. Is it hard to stomach?
How to Talk About Issues with a Loved One
This is our bread and butter, really. “How to talk with others” is the shorter version of the title (and is way more general). However, we’re keeping it specific because, while some people struggle with basic conversation (for a variety of reasons), others struggle with bringing up and/or talking about hard things.
My Friend is Driving Me Crazy - What Do I Do?!
We focus on relationships at The Counseling Hub, but when we talk about relationships, we’re not specifically talking about romantic relationships or intimate partnerships. The term relationship implies relationships of any kind. And, much like with partnerships, relationships contain their own set of problems.
Here are three things you can do if you have a friendship with somebody who is currently driving you crazy (colloquially speaking).
8 Reasons Counseling is Not the Same as Friendship
This is actually a pet peeve of mine. Probably because I hear people say things like, “I’m good at telling people what to do. I’m basically a counselor,” or, “My friends always ask my advice. I pretty much do counseling.” As a counselor educator (one who trains future counselors) and counselor in private practice, I need to clarify why this is inaccurate.
*Just because it's not a friendship doesn't mean there aren't high levels of care and camaraderie in the counseling office. We very much care for our clients and sometimes wish we could be friends outside of sessions! But we can't!!
Antidotes to the Four Horsemen
Hallelujah, am I right?! You didn’t think that I’d leave you in the lurch, did you?!
Pfffft! C’mon now, you should know me better than that at this point!
Contempt - Horsemen 4/4
In marriage therapy terms, we see contempt as a moral superiority over one's partner. Basically, if you're contemptuous, you see yourself as better than your partner and as having the 'moral' high ground…
Stonewalling - Horsemen 3/4
And it’s on to the next one. Stonewalling, my friends. This is the third horseman of the four. This one is pretty interesting, though, in that there’s some physiology that’s at play.
This is the long and short of what happens.
Partners A and B start having a discussion with heart rates around 70 beats per minute (average). It shifts into a conflict discussion/argument/disagreement. Partner A’s heart rate jumps to 80 beats per minute the second the conversation heats up. Partner B’s heart rate has gone up to about 74.