Planning a party is, for the most part, a blast. There’s a certain thrill you get when picking out special decorations, food, and activities for your friends and loved ones’ enjoyment. However, the stress of the holidays can take all the fun out of hosting an event. It can feel like there are too many things to do, without enough time to do any of them. If you want to reclaim the joy of hosting a party while tackling the responsibilities that come with the holidays, try these stress-busting tips (and find additional tips here).
I think this is going to be a really obvious blog for people who are reading, but I've been surprised before, so it's worth it to share.
When I work with couples, I tell them that the work they do is broken down into three large themes (too much detail to get into, seriously), all of which are based around the Gottman's work. We spend time on conflict (duh - that's what most people come in for), existential issues (i.e. life roles, dreams, meaning), and friendship.
Yes, friendship.
Seems really simple, right? "Just be friends with your partner!" is what they tell you, "Laugh together!" is what they say. But when you're in the throes of conflict, or when you can't even look at your partner without feeling resentment or rage or exhausting frustration or defeat, then laughing together seems like the absolute furthest thing from what you're capable of.
And, to be honest, that's not the type of thing I would tell you
Generally speaking, I'm an advocate for relationships. I spend most of my time helping people work out their issues, dispel myths around love and relationships, and create new patterns within their relationship. I love what I do.
There have been a handful of times in my career that I've not advocated for the continuation of a relationship, and they all have very similar things in common. So, before I go further, please keep in mind that:
a) I love relationships and am pro-relationship when I work with the vast majority of couples,
b) I don't typically spend time telling people 'signs to leave,' but there are some pretty important things to consider.
Here goes.
